Today was one of those days. A day that was filled with too much whining, too much tattling, too many toys on the floor, too much laundry in the basket, too many commitments on the calendar and too little food left from the last trip to the grocery store to make a good dinner. Today was one of those days when the frustrations of the day built upon each other and compounded until this mommy explodes and everyone gets yelled at whether they needed it or not.
I know that if I want my children to use kind words, I need to model that behavior and use my kind words. I know that if I want our children to control their temper, then I need to control mine. I know, really. I have read more parenting books than the average person, I have more children than the average person, I have worked with more children than the average person.....I know. I truly know what is expected of me and what I SHOULD be doing. I know, it starts with me. So, why is it so hard to do what I know?
It starts with me. It starts with me in the Word. It starts with me allowing myself to be filled by Him. I need to allow my heart to be changed and my life transformed to become more like Christ, so that when I am dealing with our children He shines through to them. I want my children to see much less of my sinful being and much more of Christ and the love and grace He has to offer them.
Today was a personal failure. Today my children saw the worst side of their mom. But, today is also a day when I can model repentance and ask forgiveness for my poor behavior. Today is a day when my children see that I am not perfect, and I don't expect them to be either. Although I may have failed today, I need to allow Jesus to turn this day around and show these precious blessings that He has given me, that they are loved. Even when I am mad or frustrated, I love them and He loves them.
Tomorrow is a new day, and I pray that it starts with me sharing the love, joy and peace of Christ with every word I say!
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