At a Bible study recently, there was some talk about Matthew 28:19...(Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey all that I have commanded you.) This is a very familiar verse and I have heard people speak on it countless times. However, this time the conversation struck me a bit differently. In the spirit of this verse (and because we love to serve) our family has been on mission trips, sponsor children in third world countries and have given money to several ministries. But, what about the disciples in my own home? Are we doing all we can to make disciples in our homes?
After thinking about Matthew 28:19 and 20 a bit longer, I began to think that I may have lost sight of my first calling, my family. Am I truly witnessing to my family the best that I can? Or, are my weaknesses and sinful nature drowning out any witness that I have? If I am not an affective witness to my own family, how can I be a witness to those outside my home?
I know way too many families, that I would consider to be wonderful Christian families, who are now struggling with their children and the choices they are making. These children have seen the hypocrisy. They see the "church mom" or the "church dad" and they see the "real mom or dad." The youngsters that I have talked to tell me that what they experience is all an act and that they want something real. They don't want to pretend to be something they are not and they don't want to be at a church where everyone is just pretending. I think the teens have a valid point. However, I think they are mistaken about one thing...I don't think their parents are pretending, I think they are just sinners. Their parents are just working hard everyday to do what is right, but everyday they fall short. Just like the rest of us.
So this makes me think that if I am going to consciously work at making disciples in my own home, (which I know is the work of the Holy Spirit, just hang with me a minute) I need to stop the hypocrisy in my home. I believe that our kids need to know that we struggle with sin everyday, and they will struggle with sin everyday, but that doesn't keep us from going to the cross each day and asking for forgiveness. That also doesn't keep us from wanting to allow the Holy Spirit to change our lives. Just because I am a sinner, my behavior is not excused. Just because God loves me just as I am, doesn't mean He doesn't want me to grow more like Him everyday. He also loves our kids just as they are, but He wants them to grow more like Him each day also. Most importantly, just because they are my kids, doesn't mean I shouldn't ask them for forgiveness when I sin against them.
Ultimately, it IS the work of the Holy Spirit in a person's life that draws them to Christ. But as a parent, I want to be sure to have a home where the Holy Spirit is free to do it's work and not hindered by my choices. Some things we can do to help our home be a great place to "plant our orchard" are: praying for our children; helping them memorize Bible verses; letting them see us taking personal devotion time; having family devotion time; attending worship services; serving others and I am now adding help them see through the hypocrisy, so they too know what it means to be a disciple of Christ. Wow, that is a long list!
Let me encourage us all to wake up each day knowing that God has called us to minister in our home first. May the love that we have for Christ fill our homes and capture our children as the Holy Spirit works in their lives. May we each have the courage to work through the hypocrisy, allow our children to see our failures and use them to help us all grow closer to Christ and the plans He has for us all. This is not going to be easy, God bless and give strength to each one of us as we focus on making disciples in our homes!
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Monday, October 21, 2013
Birthday With A Twist
I am not sure what your home is like, but our family does not have a shortage of stuff. We are blessed to have bins of toys in the playroom, shelves filled with books in the office and closets filled with clothes in each bedroom. I often think we have too much stuff.
A few years ago we decided that birthday time was one of the times of year when we accumulated more things then we needed. We started asking that friends not bring presents for the six birthdays we have in six weeks. Instead of gifts, we ask guests to help us help others with their needs. This year we collected hats and gloves for the county homeless program, we filled four large bags with new supplies. We also have thought of or have collected non-perishable foods, socks for foster kiddos, and school supplies. It is great to see how everyone really embraces the idea!
We also know people who have done similar things for their birthdays. Instead of having a typical party, they take their party and go work at the food pantry or a soup kitchen. There are also organizations like "Feed My Starving Children," that have work days for birthday parties. It really is a great way to celebrate and make a difference all at the same time.
Birthdays are a special time in our home. We love celebrating a new year with our kiddos. There are special dinners, homemade cakes, presents from family and fun activities. However, we also want our children to remember how blessed they truly are. It is important for them to be thankful for their circumstances and take a moment to brighten the day of someone who may not be as blessed.
Let me encourage you to take time to celebrate the birth of each member of your family, for they are precious! Let me also encourage you to think of ways that your family can bless others, it doesn't need to be something big, any type of help is a blessing. What type of twist can you add to your birthdays this year?
A few years ago we decided that birthday time was one of the times of year when we accumulated more things then we needed. We started asking that friends not bring presents for the six birthdays we have in six weeks. Instead of gifts, we ask guests to help us help others with their needs. This year we collected hats and gloves for the county homeless program, we filled four large bags with new supplies. We also have thought of or have collected non-perishable foods, socks for foster kiddos, and school supplies. It is great to see how everyone really embraces the idea!
We also know people who have done similar things for their birthdays. Instead of having a typical party, they take their party and go work at the food pantry or a soup kitchen. There are also organizations like "Feed My Starving Children," that have work days for birthday parties. It really is a great way to celebrate and make a difference all at the same time.
Birthdays are a special time in our home. We love celebrating a new year with our kiddos. There are special dinners, homemade cakes, presents from family and fun activities. However, we also want our children to remember how blessed they truly are. It is important for them to be thankful for their circumstances and take a moment to brighten the day of someone who may not be as blessed.
Let me encourage you to take time to celebrate the birth of each member of your family, for they are precious! Let me also encourage you to think of ways that your family can bless others, it doesn't need to be something big, any type of help is a blessing. What type of twist can you add to your birthdays this year?
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Spinning Out of Control
There are days when the events, activities and situations seem to start our lives spinning out of control. Sometimes it is simply because the calendar just got too jammed with commitments, sometimes it is because of illness, sometimes it is because of a child's decision making, sometimes it is because of work and sometimes it is because of more than one of these developments.
When my days start spinning out of control there are many things that seem to fall to the side ...my personal devotion time, any personal time, individual cuddle time with each child, housework....pretty much anything that is not "screaming" for attention. I am discovering that by allowing some things to go without attention, my days can regain some calmness. However, I am also discovering that their are somethings that when not given attention, cause my days to begin spiraling even more out of control.
I remember an article that I read several years ago about how God gives me enough time each day for the items that He desires for me to complete. The key to finishing these tasks each day is doing my best to make my "to do" list, match what God has planned for me to do today. I find this idea easier said than done, but something clearly stated in scripture: "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans." Proverbs 16:3
What I am learning is that not being deliberate about my devotion time, doesn't work. My devotion time is too important to skip and it is one of those items that helps keep my day from spinning. My children are also learning that my devotion time is a very important time to me, they know that interrupting this time is not wise. Only serious situations should call mom from her devotions. (Most days my devotions are complete before they awake, but sometimes there is an early riser or two)
Another commonly pushed aside area that I need to intentionally focus on, is individual contact time. On days that seem busier than any before, I must make sure to spend at least a few moments with each child. It can be as simple as rubbing their back as I look over their shoulder at their homework, eating next to them at the table or reading them a book. No matter what it is, both of us will have a better day if we are able to connect on a personal level.
Recently I posted on how my ability to juggle seven kiddos comes from the strength that Christ gives me. Since that post, the number of days that seem to overwhelm me have greatly outnumbered the "ordinary" days. (God sense of humor) I still know that my strength comes from Christ, but I also know that I am really good at committing to more than I should. I am great at establishing my plans before committing them to the Lord.
Let me encourage you to commit your plans to the Lord, to rely on Christ's strength, and to be intentional about you devotion time. There will still be days that seem to spin away from us, just hold on and remember to focus on what is truly important.
When my days start spinning out of control there are many things that seem to fall to the side ...my personal devotion time, any personal time, individual cuddle time with each child, housework....pretty much anything that is not "screaming" for attention. I am discovering that by allowing some things to go without attention, my days can regain some calmness. However, I am also discovering that their are somethings that when not given attention, cause my days to begin spiraling even more out of control.
I remember an article that I read several years ago about how God gives me enough time each day for the items that He desires for me to complete. The key to finishing these tasks each day is doing my best to make my "to do" list, match what God has planned for me to do today. I find this idea easier said than done, but something clearly stated in scripture: "Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and He will establish your plans." Proverbs 16:3
What I am learning is that not being deliberate about my devotion time, doesn't work. My devotion time is too important to skip and it is one of those items that helps keep my day from spinning. My children are also learning that my devotion time is a very important time to me, they know that interrupting this time is not wise. Only serious situations should call mom from her devotions. (Most days my devotions are complete before they awake, but sometimes there is an early riser or two)
Another commonly pushed aside area that I need to intentionally focus on, is individual contact time. On days that seem busier than any before, I must make sure to spend at least a few moments with each child. It can be as simple as rubbing their back as I look over their shoulder at their homework, eating next to them at the table or reading them a book. No matter what it is, both of us will have a better day if we are able to connect on a personal level.
Recently I posted on how my ability to juggle seven kiddos comes from the strength that Christ gives me. Since that post, the number of days that seem to overwhelm me have greatly outnumbered the "ordinary" days. (God sense of humor) I still know that my strength comes from Christ, but I also know that I am really good at committing to more than I should. I am great at establishing my plans before committing them to the Lord.
Let me encourage you to commit your plans to the Lord, to rely on Christ's strength, and to be intentional about you devotion time. There will still be days that seem to spin away from us, just hold on and remember to focus on what is truly important.
Tuesday, October 8, 2013
Helping Children Be Budget Minded
Fall in our home brings birthday season. We are blessed to have 6 birthdays in 6 weeks. It gets a bit crazy at times, but we do truly enjoy this season of celebration.
I am sure you can imagine how expensive this time could become when seven children are all trying to purchase birthday presents for their siblings. It can be quite the task. We have developed a system, however, that seems to work great for our family. It provides each child with the opportunity to choose a gift for each sibling and develop their money managing skills at the same time. A win-win for our whole family.
Here is what we do, if you like it, maybe you can start something similar in your home....
First, we establish a budget, it is usually $2 per child; meaning everyone gets $2 for each person's gift. (thus depending on the child they get between $10 and $12 to spend for others) In our last community there was a church that had a ginormous rummage sale each September. We would use this event as our shopping venue, it was great. Where we live currently, our town has a community wide rummage sale during the same time frame. We are able to use this event for our shopping now a days. It is much more difficult to find items this way, so at the end of the day we head to the local thrift store to help fill in any gaps that are left.
I really enjoy this way of celebrating! It is amazing how many things a child can find for $2 or less. Each child is responsible for finding their own gifts to give (ok, I helped the 18 month old). Every child knows their budget and is able to move within their budget to fill their list. For example, if they find the "perfect" present for one of their siblings but it is $3, they know that they need to spend only $1.50 on two of their other siblings. The majority of the time, they have money left over at the end of the day. They were able to find gifts for everyone for less than their budget. No one is allowed to exceed their budget.
If a child is about to go over budget, they can suggest an item they found be purchased by someone else. This gets them all looking for great ideas for each other. There are always lots of suggestions and "look at this" being tossed about. However, the ultimate decision lands with each child. They need to be comfortable with the gift they select, comfortable with their budget and know that their sibling will truly enjoy what they purchased.
Our shopping day is one of my favorite days of the year. It brings me great joy to see everyone helping each other and truly thinking about what the other person wants. I love that they are learning to manage money and make wise choices with the resources that they have. But, most of all I love that I can give my kiddos the opportunity to bless each other. I can't wait to do it all over again next year!
This is just one thing that we do to provide our children with an opportunity to manage money. Maybe this won't work for your family, so let me encourage you to find something that will. In today's culture, people are having more money problems than in the past. It amazes me how much money people make and they still aren't able to pay their bills, or they make choices that make it very challenging to pay their bills. I don't want my children to face unnecessary financial struggles because they never learned how to manage their money. Let us all help our children to know that money is just an asset to be used wisely, not something that controls us; and that we don't need lots of money to have fun and bless others.
I am sure you can imagine how expensive this time could become when seven children are all trying to purchase birthday presents for their siblings. It can be quite the task. We have developed a system, however, that seems to work great for our family. It provides each child with the opportunity to choose a gift for each sibling and develop their money managing skills at the same time. A win-win for our whole family.
Here is what we do, if you like it, maybe you can start something similar in your home....
First, we establish a budget, it is usually $2 per child; meaning everyone gets $2 for each person's gift. (thus depending on the child they get between $10 and $12 to spend for others) In our last community there was a church that had a ginormous rummage sale each September. We would use this event as our shopping venue, it was great. Where we live currently, our town has a community wide rummage sale during the same time frame. We are able to use this event for our shopping now a days. It is much more difficult to find items this way, so at the end of the day we head to the local thrift store to help fill in any gaps that are left.
I really enjoy this way of celebrating! It is amazing how many things a child can find for $2 or less. Each child is responsible for finding their own gifts to give (ok, I helped the 18 month old). Every child knows their budget and is able to move within their budget to fill their list. For example, if they find the "perfect" present for one of their siblings but it is $3, they know that they need to spend only $1.50 on two of their other siblings. The majority of the time, they have money left over at the end of the day. They were able to find gifts for everyone for less than their budget. No one is allowed to exceed their budget.
If a child is about to go over budget, they can suggest an item they found be purchased by someone else. This gets them all looking for great ideas for each other. There are always lots of suggestions and "look at this" being tossed about. However, the ultimate decision lands with each child. They need to be comfortable with the gift they select, comfortable with their budget and know that their sibling will truly enjoy what they purchased.
Our shopping day is one of my favorite days of the year. It brings me great joy to see everyone helping each other and truly thinking about what the other person wants. I love that they are learning to manage money and make wise choices with the resources that they have. But, most of all I love that I can give my kiddos the opportunity to bless each other. I can't wait to do it all over again next year!
This is just one thing that we do to provide our children with an opportunity to manage money. Maybe this won't work for your family, so let me encourage you to find something that will. In today's culture, people are having more money problems than in the past. It amazes me how much money people make and they still aren't able to pay their bills, or they make choices that make it very challenging to pay their bills. I don't want my children to face unnecessary financial struggles because they never learned how to manage their money. Let us all help our children to know that money is just an asset to be used wisely, not something that controls us; and that we don't need lots of money to have fun and bless others.
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