Friday, April 5, 2013

Self-control Now or ? Later

We pulled in the parking lot to find both an ambulance and a police car parked by the front doors. "I hope everyone is ok!" one daughter said. "What do you think happened?" another said. I really had no idea what might have happened. We decided to go in a side door and avoid the "excitement" happening at the front. When inside we found out that a man at our church's "soup kitchen" had lost his self-control. He had thrown glasses, chairs, salt and pepper, and was shouting all sorts of poor language. He needed to be removed and the people cut by the glass needed to be taken care of. We had thankfully missed the entire episode and everything would be fine, no one was seriously hurt.

In our home, most "punishments" occur because someone has lost their self-control. Maybe we lost control of our body and hit someone, maybe we lost control of our mouth and said something we shouldn't have, or maybe we lost control of our decisions and made a poor choice. Each one of our days we talk about self-control and practice trying to use self-control in all situations. We feel it is important for us to focus on our self-control now, because a lack of self-control can become a serious situation later.

I am sure you encounter grown adults who lack self-control each day. I see it when I look at the afternoon commute, or hear stories of shopping on black friday, or when I spend a day with our children at the park. I am truly amazed that there seems to be a whole generation of people who appear to have never been taught to control their actions and put others needs in front of their own. Our children see these situations as well. They notice the behavior of others in the stores or at the park, they see this lack of control being acted out in their favorite movie or show. If we don't take the time to "teach" our children self-control, I am certain they would not learn it from some other source.

In my opinion, the hardest part of helping our children develop self-control for me is looking in the mirror. Do my children see me demonstrating self-control? Am I able to curve my words when I become angry? Am I able to grab a healthier snack when I am hunger? Am I able to put down the electronics when I have responsibilities to attend to? Am I able to act in the way I am asking them to act?.......honestly, no, but we are all working towards having more self-control and fulfilling what is asked of us in Philippians 2:3 and 4: "Do noting out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others."

No comments: